This time next year, this is where I will be

This time next year, I hope to be somewhere in this picture. Unless you happen to be familiar with places in the maritime's, you have no idea where this is. I decided I want to go to Dalhousie University next year, in Halifax Nova Scotia. I'm going to have to work my ass off to get there, but for some reason somethings pulling me towards that school. Don't get me wrong, I love Ottawa and Algonquin College, but there is something about moving away and getting that fresh start that appeals to me. I have relatives in the city so I wouldn't be completely alone. I need to work hard, but I've decided that's what I'm going to do. I mean, there isn't really anything, except my parents, that could 100% influence me to stay. I will do this.

the smallest things seem to be the ones you miss the most

The past couple weeks I've realized that I miss something, in a way almost you could say someone. In high school when things got busy like this, and I felt the kind of pressure that I do now, I always had a support system. My old boy friend was always there for me. We had dated almost three and a half years, and I realize now that he's one of the things that kept me reasonably relaxed and gave me that encouragement that I needed. Lately I've really been missing that. I guess I never really realized how great that aspect of him and our relationship was to have in my life, and I really don't have anything like that anymore. It was even better that he was in the same classes, and that he was very smart. Now when I have questions, I find myself going to the boys I barely know and asking them - I've never really gotten along with all girls, boys are way easier to ask these things to. I guess I do miss him, he was a big part of my life. I hope that one day I'm able to find something even close to what a great guy he was, and maybe find that comfort and support in someone else.

Choose to see the world through optomistic eyes, or at least try to.

I dread Monday mornings. It's such a cliche to dislike Monday's, usually it's because it's the day people go back to work, a new week starts, and those crazy partyers are still hung over from the weekend. My reason is because of a two hour compulsory course called Research. As important and useful as this course may be, I don't know a single person in my program that enjoys this class. There are a lot of issues with the teacher, mostly in regards to how confused and incompetent she is. This may hound harsh, but I really don't care if you have a PhD, if you can't teach me it means absolutely nothing. We'll see how tomorrow goes tomorrow, I have a strange feeling the stress and pressure is about to be piled on towards our group research assignment. Tomorrow we begin week five and last time I checked we had seven weeks of this group section.

It's insane how quickly the past month has gone by. I've managed to work my way into a routine that I'm not entirely a fan of. Somehow within that I have to try and work in visits to the Algonquin gym, runs on my own and visits to this new drop in dance studio I found out by Vanier. I'm really looking forward to the dancing especially, so I hope the studio works out. I would also love to finally try yoga. Where do I find the time?

As for the last post, scratch that. Obviously nothing could possibly continue going well for me, oh no it just fizzles withing a few days. Lately though I have been incredibly busy with school. It's to the point where I don't have a life. I'm sure plenty of people may say this, and exaggerate that fact, but this is not an exaggeration. For example, the only time I left my house this weekend was to go to work, and that includes the past week as well. Can someone save me from this disaster? I knew going into this that nursing would be a lot of work, but it worries me because I know the next four years after this will only get worse. I'm already loosing sleep and getting daily head aches. I'm hoping my life doesn't turn into some mess that I hate, because I know for a fact that if it does I'll do nothing but wonder if nursing is for me and doubt how much I really want this. I'm sure everything will work out in it's own funny way.